Wedding Menu: Food to Serve Guest In a Typical Igbo Traditional Wedding

If you are planning to hold a typical Igbo traditional wedding and you don’t have any of this food on your menu then you have to think again. I have listed a few of them here. The Igbo people are socially and culturally unique, blessed with rich and nutritious food. The purpose of this post is to give you an idea of what is expected of you especially in the area of food. This will also help you on menu budgeting for dream Igbo wedding.

Uha soup and cassava ball (fufu): Uha soup (ofe uha) is a delicacy that is present in most Igbo occasions – traditional wedding ceremony, child dedication, house warming, new yam festival, August meeting etc. This soup is more common with the people of Anambra. Uha soup is prepared specially for occasions. Ingredient…. Uha leaf, water, palm oil, seasoning and salt, water pepper, onion, thickener e.g. achi. Crayfish, smoked fish, big stock fish, bush meat, Assorted meat, kpomo etc.

Bitter leaf soup (ofe onugbu):This is also an important dish on the menu of most Igbo occasion – traditional wedding ceremony etc. This soup is eaten with fufu (cassava ball), pounded yam, garri (eba). ofe onugbu. Bitter leaf can also be employ in cooking other soups, some of which are widely eaten across Nigeria – Egusi and bitterleaf soup. The versatility of this leaf cannot be over stretch. This leaf has been found to be medicinal – its speed up metabolism, therefore good for weight loss, it reduces high sugar level.

Ingredient- Cocoyam is use as a thickener and it is the most important ingredient used in preparing this soup. Cocoyam is also use in cooking other soups. Cocoyam soup (ofe ede) is also a popular delicacy with the igbo people. Other ingredient use in making bitter leaf /ofe onugbuare; bitter leaf, palm oil, assorted meat, seasoning/salt, fresh fish, stock fish, pepper, etc.

Wedding Dessert

Igbo traditional wedding is not complete without dessert, there are two popular dessert served in wedding today; the African salad (Abacha with Ugba) and then Nkwobi.

Hope this post has helped someone out there who is confused on what to serve guest at his/her Igbo wedding reception.

image by: Nigerian recipies

Traditional Wedding Rights and Process in Igede Land, Benue State Nigeria

Marriage is the coming together of man and woman as husband and wife to be father and mother to any up-spring produced by their union. Marriage rights and tradition among the Igede people in Nigeria is unique, fill with rich cultural practises. Formerly Igede marriages come in different forms; Accompanying marriage, Elopement -running away with a bride and abduction (force marriage) catching a bride of the interest either from road or market before negotiating the marriage rights with her parent. Which ever the case maybe there must be gun firing, telling other intending suitors to keep away from her; the lady is officially somebody’s wife.

Igede people are from Benue state, Nigeria they can be found in two out of the 23 Local Government Areas in the state namely; Odi and Oju local government area.

Recently we have observed that civilisation and Christianity has eroded some of the intriguing aspects of the marriage right. However, it has also help in stopping forced marriage. For this article am only going to limit my discussion with the traditional marriage rights of this wonderful people of Igede.

Age Long Practise of Igede Traditional Wedding

Most times marriage in Igede land is stimulated by a boy or girl’s hard-work and good character. A mother or house wife could solicit for her male or female relation to marriage. She may decide to ask a girls hand in marriage for her relation. She therefore, facilitates the initial contact between the would be bride and groom.

The engagement

A day is set aside when the groom visit the bride accompany by his friends, at this gathering the bride and groom are suppose put on a transparent clothing or semi-unclad. This is done for both parties to see each body so as to enable them have a fair opinion of themselves. Any injury mark on a man’s body could be judge to a hoe or cutlass cut which means the man is hard-working. This believes; invariably means he can take care of the woman and she is assured of abundant food at home.

Courtship can now commence after this meeting – if the bride is satisfied with the groom. At this point also the groom is always careful, making sure he prevent a situation where by the girl would prefer his friend/relative to him. There is gift exchange between the bride and groom. The man shows that he is a good son in-law by farming for the bride’s parent from time to time. At this point also secret investigation begins, both by the groom’s and bride’s parent – this is done to know if the family of the other side is free from diseases, insanity, stealing traits, alcoholism and what have you. This investigation is also done to ascertain that both families are not related by blood. If unfortunately let say the groom’s family is not satisfied with the out-come of their investigation and marriage could not hold, the farm work the groom did for the bride’s parent will be paid back in cash, other presents and gifts will be returned also. If the bride’s parent fined the groom not worthy of marrying their daughter, they would tactically withdraw from the process.

Canal knowledge between the prospective bride and groom is forbidden before the final marriage right is observed. Gifts and encomium is always showered on a bride who proves her virginity on her wedding night.

A mediator is contracted by the bride’s parent, usually a man through whom all demand could be channeled to. This is after the father must have certified the marriage free from doubts.

The Bride price

Bride price in Igede land is called ekwuotaba. It has no fixed amount; it can be paid installmentely. It is expected that the balance of the bride price is paid shortly before the girl is taken to the man’s house. Good gesture shown by the husband towards his in-law in time of hardship or need is also part of bride price. In fact there is a saying in Igede that says “payment of bride-price can’t be exhausted”.

In Igede tradition, bride price is complete when twelve bundles of brass bars is provided which today is an equivalent of N10,000 and above. The amount paid for the brass bars varies from family to family and according to the social status of the family.

The wedding ceremony

After the bride price is settled, a possible date is fixed when the groom should come for his wife. The arrival of the groom and his people is marked with a lot of funfair and feasting (Uganyahuonyewe) in the bride’s house. A bride is regarded as wife only when a gun is shot at least once on her arrival at the husband’s house in company of her friends. There will be shouting and jubilation in the groom’s compound. Smoked meat and roasted bush meat well-seasoned with pepper and palm wine is served to everyone at the reception ceremony.

We are meant to know that a new wife is firstly camped (ahuOjuga) in the home of her relative living close to her husband’s house at least three days before she finally moves into her husband house. This is done to settle any complain between the groom and his in-laws. Eating and dancing is the order of the day, at the end of the day the bride return to her lodge. The next day the groom’s father host both the husband and wife to a big feast and blesses their union. A hen is slaughtered – the gizzard and kidney is for the couple to eat. The meat of the fowl is shared into two equal parts, one part to the bride’s family and the other to the groom’s family. These wedding sacraments depict everlasting commitment of the couple to each other till death. Divorce in Igede land is not tolerated.

I hope this is educative enough…feel free to add your opinion

What's the Big Deal About Engagement Ring? A Little History and Culture of Engagement Ring

An Engagement ring is a ring that shows the person wearing it is betrothed to be married. In Nigeria, engagement rings are worn mostly by women, and rings can feature diamonds or other gemstones. When a man woos a woman he wants to marry, he presents an engagement ring to her while he proposes marriage or directly after she accepts his marriage proposal. It represents a formal agreement to future marriage.

The word “betrothed” comes from the Anglo-Saxon word “troweth,” which means truth.  In medieval England, a betrothed couple shared a “truth” or “pledge” to marry, and a ring served as the outward sign that a woman was promised to another. Before the engagement ring became a tradition, only royalty and the affluent had engagement rings that were typically gemstones encased in metal. It has always been a sort of "contract" between couple.

Below are some information on history and traditions through the ages and various cultures.

Engagement rings have been credited to Ancient Egypt, but an instance of exchanging rings can also be traced to Ancient Greece and Rome too.

In ancient Greece married couples weren't the only people who gifted each other gold jewels for their fingers — lovers did too (but with the inclination that they'd tie the knot soon enough)

In Ancient Egypt, men wore rings to symbolize their wealth, hence sharing one with their wife to represent the joint ownership of riches, the Egyptians wore their engagement ring on the ring finger and believed that the vein in the "ring finger" was directly connected to the heart.

Ancient Rome took the exchange one step further by having a betrothed couple's parents exchange tokens too. The Romans agreed and gave rings to their fiancé to prove their "ownership" of her to others.

In the Middle Ages, the Christian groom would give gemstones to the fiancé’s parents to show his intent for marrying her. Then he would place a ring on three of his bride's fingers to symbolize their belief in the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. The issue about period of engagement also arose in the Middle Ages, when, Pope Innocent III instituted a mandatory waiting period between betrothal and marriage.

In the 18th century, diamonds were found in large quantities in Brazil, making the diamond engagement ring more accessible. It the late 1800's an even larger supply of diamonds was found in South Africa, causing the prices for diamonds to drop. De Beers Consolidated Mines Ltd was in charge of mining it. They launched "A Diamond is Forever", marketing campaign to re-invigorate the diamond industry when it was going down. It was successful because it convinced families to retain their diamonds as heirlooms which caused a new demand for diamonds.

Today in Nigeria, diamond engagement or wedding rings represents social class. Social elite present diamond rings as a gift to their spouse to show how wealthy they are. This trend could be found more with people in the entertaining industries, billionaire heir and heiress and the royal families.

image by: bride.com

The History and Culture of Having Groomsmen and Bridesmaids in Wedding Party

Wedding are not just about the bride and groom alone; they’re also about exalting friends and family members who have supported and loved the couple throughout their relationship and in their individual lives. Wedding party history plays a big part in the roles of the bridesmaids and groomsmen in modern day weddings. In most cases, the bridal party doesn't realize that this custom was initiated with the groomsmen instead of the bride's attendants or bridesmaids. The history of weddings is actually quite interesting.

Wedding party tradition is common throughout Nigeria and the world, whether the bride and groom choose to have ten maids and men apiece or just one best woman and man is up to them. But when and where did this custom begin? 

The tradition of bridesmaids and groomsmen was instituted into wedding ceremony dates back to the ancient Rome. They believe back then that demons and forces are moving around to hunt down the new couple. Therefore, ten maids and ten men are to stand by the bride and groom to protect them from evil spirits. Bridesmaids and groomsmen dressed identically to the bride and groom, respectively, to confuse these malicious forces. This is in line with the notion that if all of the women and all of the men were dressed the same, then the vile demons would not be able to target the bride and groom specifically.

In the modern times especially in Nigeria the numbers of groomsmen and bridesmaids have reduced respectively. The distinctive dressing has also changed, many of the original duties perform by the best man and maid of honor hasn’t changed much; for example early weddings were held at the bride's home and the first "maid of honor" was likely a reliable and trustworthy family servant who attended to the bride's needs in the days preceding the wedding. Her duties likely included helping the bride gets dressed, making the bridal hairstyle and decorating for the wedding feast, collecting and packaging of household items for the bride to take her new home.

Recently the job of groomsmen is to plan bachelor party, usher wedding guest to their seat, escort bridesmaids down the aisle. Like the best man and the groomsmen, the bridesmaids and the maid of honor duty is to stand as witnesses for the ceremony, helping to validate its authenticity. The most prominent duty of the bridesmaids and groomsmen is to give toast to honor the bride and groom. In most Nigerian weddings only the maid of honor and the best man stand up to give the toast. 

image by flickr.com

Role Switching - See the New Role of a Man and Woman in Marriage

Have you ever for once seat back and contemplate about the role a man plays in a marriage and life in general with relation to his female counterpart. I can’t help but ponder how things going to play out if the roles are switched – the woman taking up the role or responsibility of the man and verse versa.

Let’s switch the role and ask ourselves some funny questions. What is going to happen if?

          A woman asked a man out and then takes him out on a date.
          A woman proposes to a man with diamond engagement ring.

·         A woman pays the groom-price of a man.

·         A woman is the breadwinner of the house.

·         A woman is the head of the home and the man is her helper.

·         A man takes up the last name of the woman.

·         The children also takes up the last name of the woman.

·         A man stays at home to take care of the children.

·         A woman punches and beat up a man whenever he offends her.

   A woman throws away a man luggage out, and then he comes crying and begging her not      to throw him out of the house.

    A man can conceive and bear children

Ah thank God this can only happen in the cartoon world. You are free to add your own imagination.

Kudos to the female gender for the tremendous role they have played in our family life, I like will to say that our women deserve the best; we must treat them with love and respect. In marriage everyone plays equal role. Therefore, partners need to put all hands on deck to make the home a happy place.

The Culture Of Wedding Ring And Its Meaning In Nigeria

Wedding ring signifies bond, everlasting love, togetherness till death do you part. It is the gift couple present to each other to bind their vows.

Most couples cherish the instant when they slip a ring on their partner. They look into each other eyes, knowing the fact they will be together from that day on. What most people don’t know is that this has been taking place for years and revolves around the giving of wedding rings. The implication and symbolization behind wedding rings is enormous and as complication as its own love story. I decide to write on this so that couples understand exactly why they exchange wedding rings.

The circle form which means forever, eternity, with no beginning or end, not only to Nigerians, but many other ancient cultures. The hole in the center of the ring also has its own meaning. It wasn’t just considered a space, but rather a gate way or door, leading to things and events both known and unknown. To a give woman a ring signifies never-ending and immortal love.

In Nigeria the culture of exchanging wedding rings was introduced by the missionaries. Our traditional marriages even till today do not recognize the wedding ring as a symbol of forever love. No wonder some religious group especially deeper life bible church etc do not use wedding rings. They use the bible as the gift they exchange with each other instead of a wedding ring. Their reason is based on the fact that the culture of wedding is pagan in nature and is not biblical inclined – According to then God almighty do not recognized it.

HISTORY OF WEDDING RING AND THE MEANING

As we all know the circle has always been significance from ancient culture to the present as a symbol of wholeness and perfection. Its endlessness is the perfect symbol of oneness and unity, no beginning, no end – what more could couple need than the unclouded wish to spend all time together? Some can go as far engraving romantic phrase within their wedding rings.

Early on, the caveman bound himself to his mate with a cord of woven rushes as a symbol that their spirits were one.

Ancient European Northern believed that a lover’s knot was a symbol of love, faith, and friendship. The knot was formed out of the hair of the beloved, woven into a knot that was then worn as a ring.

The roman’s also eventually adopted this tradition but with own twist. Rather than offering a ring to a woman as a symbol of love, they awarded them as a symbol of ownership. Roman men would claim their woman with the giving of a ring. Roman betrothal rings were later made of iron and called “Anulus pronubus’’.

Wedding ring came into use in Christian ceremonies about 870; even then, it was not the simple plain band as we know it today. It usually was highly decorated with engraved doves, lyres, or two linked hands. The church discouraged such ring as 'heathenish' - Believing on other gods. Around the 13^th to 16^th century, wedding and betrothal rings were considerably simplified, and given a more spiritual look which was very aptly expressed by a Bishop when he dubbed “symbol of the union of hearts.”

The habit of wearing the wedding ring on the fourth finger of the left hand is based upon a Grecian fable that the artery from that finger flows directly to the heart.

The wedding ring was also used as a symbol in Egyptian culture. The wedding band is mentioned in the hieroglyphics on walls of tombs interpreted by archeologists. Egyptian bands are usually heavy metal, encrusted with precious or semi-precious stones. In contrast, the average Roman citizen is reputed to have found “ugly metal bands” to suffice.

IN CONCLUSION there is a saying that says “The more expensive the material, the more love shown to the receiver; the value of the ring also demonstrated the wealth of the giver”.

 You are free to add to this article..your comments are welcome.